We are looking for an experienced nanny for full-time work. Previous experience a must. Requirements must include the following:
- able to swaddle a baby (a la Doctor's way, a la Lindsey's way)
- able to change a baby (preferably into something that doessn't cry)
- ably to think multiple-sneezes and poop-grunts are extremely cute
- desire to be urinated on (allergies to urine are not allowed)
- able to function between 12PM and 8am (unlike baby's father)
- able to use a microwave. Stove experience a bonus!
- able to nurse a plus (hm...that's a bit awkward...)
Please send resumes to this blog site, including four letters of reference, two must be from someone 6 months or younger. Also, in 500 words or less, write an essay from one of the following ideas:
- "Why babies often look like lizards, despite how much mom says they take after their father."
- "Compare and contrast the following: a sleeping baby, a crying baby, a baby that has just peed all over you."
- "At what age should you stop using a rectal thermometer?"
OTHER JOB INFORMATION:
Date Posted: 8/31/06
Job Type: Full Time
Education: At least the 4th grade
Compensation: Free bed, free food, occasional pat on the back
In other news...it has come to my attention that some of you want BACKGROUNDS for your computer screens. Here are two of them.
Click on the picture you would like, and it will open a NEW WINDOW with a full size picture (1800x1200) that should fit on any screen setting. Then right-click the picture (in the new window) and select the option "SET AS BACKGROUND."
ENJOY! If you have any more requests (or requests for more specific pictures), just leave a comment!
3 comments:
Wow! The picture works great. Thanks Rob.
Yes, I plan on doing a sponge-bath post soon, which will include those pictures. But I have some friends who haven't made the site yet, as well as tons of my own family coming up this weekend...
Any more requests on the backgrounds?
Hrrrm, if this whole teaching in an inner-city school thing doesn't work out, I'm your woman!
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